NINJA ASSASSIN HIT LIST: Installment #3
By: Chris Lobkovich
As no one shall ever be spared the wrath of the Ninja Assassin, this week I’m going to tackle a very heavy subject (and one that hits close to home for me). Just when you thought it was safe to leave your home and start purchasing MLS jerseys, the Sounders FC has swooped in and taken modern jersey design to all time hideousness. For those of you who have not had the displeasure of laying eyes on one of these jerseys, here you go….
Yup. That’s bright ass green. Now, I’m no expert, but unless they are planning on doing charity work as roadside construction flaggers, there is no need for anybody to wear a shirt that brightly colored. And the picture doesn’t do it justice. While travelling in Seattle over the Christmas holiday, I happened into the Sounders team store to perhaps purchase some apparel to show my support for the new franchise. I was however unable to complete the task because after laying eyes on the jerseys I fell into epileptic fits that would only subside after I was removed from the store. Sadly, I will be forced to wear my USL Sounders apparel until they see the error of their ways and come up with something a little better.
The Sounders, by selecting these jerseys to wear, have single handedly set the MLS and the sport of soccer back about 13 years by my count. Let us not forget how far the sport has come since these days……
So please Mr. Carey, and the rest of your cohorts in the Pacific Northwest, please change your ways…. Don’t bring about another decade of awful uniforms and crappy soccer. The American public just can’t take it.
Editors Note – The opinions expressed in this blog entry, no matter how right they are, are those solely of the Ninja Assassin and not of anybody else in the world.
April 15th, 2009 at 2:28 pm
Look at that photo of the Inaugural MLS players and jerseys. That is a riot! The haircuts and jerseys look awful. Who is that clown that is is the SJ jersey? No wonder the Clash didn’t make it.
On another note, I know I’m lining myself in front of the firing squad here, but I like the Sounders jerseys. Called me biased, as I’m a big fan of the Sounders and the young, and possibly sexually perverse, Fredy Montero, but I think they are interesting and different. So much so, that I ordered one and got one coming in the mail.
April 15th, 2009 at 3:04 pm
Well, no harm will come to you from the Ninja Assassin for loving the Sounders. They’re a great squad in a great city and have really done great things for the sport and MLS. However, by sporting one of those jerseys you might draw the wrath of people everywhere who aren’t color blind. I’m just giving you a heads up….
April 15th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
The jerseys are terrible, luckily the Sounders dynamic play takes the attention away. Sexually perverse huh, you sound excited about that.
April 15th, 2009 at 11:25 pm
err…… yeah, that sexually perverse line, didn’t sound quite right.
April 16th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
That’s what happens when you put an MLS franchise in tree hugging land! Sadly I quite like the jersey, must be the only one!!
March 17th, 2010 at 10:45 am
Those are the best looking Jersey’s in MLS. Very intelligent advertising on them too. Now alll the XBOX 360 gamers in the world will want one of those. I’d venture to say that they will be the top selling jersey in MLS.